yay i get the house to my self im so happy yay go me my dad is gone at work and i tricked my sister in going with him and telling her that i would do the dishes, but she is so annoying but know im happy its quite..

1. Are we friends?
2. Do you have a crush on me?
3. Would you kiss me?
4. Would you enjoy it?
5. Would you ever ask me out?
6. Would you make a move on me in a movie theater?
7. Would you hold me if I was crying?
8. Would you take care of me when I'm sick?
9. Do you want to tell me something that you couldn't before?
10. If I gave you my phone number, would you call me?
11. If you heard a rumor about me, would you defend me?
12. Do you talk about me?
13. Do you think I'm a good person?
14. Would you take me to a romantic walk on the beach?
15. Do you think I'm hot?
16. If you could change anything about me would you?
17. Will you post this so I can fill it out for you?
18.do you think i laugh funny?
19. do i ever cross your mind?
20. Do you love me?

A little boy went up to his father and asked "Dad, where did all of my intelligence come from?"

The father replied "Well son, you must have got it from your mother because I still have mine."
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A doctor examined a woman, took the husband aside, and said, "I don't like the looks of your wife at all."

"Me neither doc," said the husband, "but she's a great cook and really good with the kids."
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An old man goes to the Wizard to ask him if he can remove a curse he has been living with for the last 40 years. The Wizard says, "Maybe, but you will have to tell me the exact words that were used to put the curse on you. The old man says without hesitation, "I now pronounce you man and wife."
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A blonde calls Delta Airlines and asks, "Can you tell me how long it'll take to fly from San Francisco to New York City?"

The agent replies, "Just a minute..."

"Thank you," the blonde says, and hangs up.
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Moe: "My wife got me to believe in religion." Joe: "Really?" Moe: "Yeah. Until I married her I didn't believe in hell."

10. My wife and I can't come to the phone right now, but if you'll leave your name and number, we'll get back to you as soon as we're finished.

9. Hello, you are talking to a machine. I am capable of receiving messages. My owners do not need siding, windows or a tub,and their carpets are clean. They give to charity at the office and don't need their picture taken. If you're still with me, leave your name and home phone number and they will get back to you.

8. This is not an answering machine - this is a telepathic thought-recording device. After the tone, think about your name, your number, and your reason for calling.... and I'll think about returning your call.

7. Hi! John's answering machine is broken. This is his refrigerator. Please speak very slowly, and I'll stick your message to myself with one of these magnets.

6. Hi. This is John: If you are the phone company, I already sent the money. If you are my parents, please send money. If you are my bank, you didn't lend me enough money. If you are my friends, you owe me money. If you are a female, don't worry, I have LOTS of money.

5. A is for academics, B is for beer. One of those reasons is why we're not here. So, leave a message.

4. Hello! If you leave a message, I'll call you soon. If you leave a"sexy" message, I'll call sooner.

3. Hi. Now YOU say something.

2. Hi. I'm probably home, I'm just avoiding someone I don't like. Leave me a message, and if I don't call back, it's you.

And the Number 1 Actual Answering Machine Message Recorded and Verified by The World Famous International Institute of Answering MachineMessages.

1. Hello, you've reached Jim and Sonya. We can't pick up the phone right now, because we're doing something we really enjoy. Sonya likes doing it up and down, and I like doing it left to right... real slowly. So leave a message, and when we're done brushing our teeth, we'll call you back.

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